I N S E N S I T I V E

This post is about me questioning why there has to be this word called I-N-S-E-N-S-I-T-I-V-E. Then if that adjective is present, that would mean there are people in the world born to be that. Or, much worse, people who aren't.. but pretends to be. I don't understand why some people would intentionally play it safe just to avoid what's not supposed to be avoided. Pretending not to see things when it's right there in front of their faces. There are just those who keep it silent so they can avoid hurting you or anything; but what they probably don't know is that silence hurts twice as much.

You know.. people tend to claim that they're outspoken, witty and confident, someone who can speak their mind and is not scared about what other people say or think about them and what they do. But sometimes, their words turn out to be some piece of crap! Oh yeah we can all say "we don't care", but your actions say otherwise. What a pity to those who think they're out of their nutshells when they're actually not. Think about it, we can all be so full of words. We only think what we wanna think, see what we wanna see about ourselves, believe what we want to believe; but have you ever gone into the depths of your own self and figured out if that's really who you are? Perhaps honesty becomes one of the hardest qualities there is.

How hard is it to tell your friend that she looks awful in that dress? Is it harder to tell your girlfriend that you don't like stuff about her? Or is it worst to confront your wife/husband about cheating? What I'm trying to say is.. just say what you feel. You don't have to hide that you hate yourself, you don't have to pretend that you're cool and outgoing, you don't have to make other people believe that you're great when you're not, you know you can't keep showing them someone that you're actually not. You don't have to hide what or how you feel about someone or something. What are you ashamed of anyway? Why aren't you proud about stuff in your life? Or is it that you're too proud of yourself you don't wanna stain the shiny image you've sculpted in the watchers' eyes?

There are people who aren't blind, whose eyes aren't closed but they couldn't see. Still they couldn't see. Or probably they haven't started realizing things laid on their tables. And, on second thought, maybe they could.. but prefer to ignore what they see.. like running away from a difficulty, trying to avoid possible dilemmas. People who never tell negative stuff like "i don't eat fish so cook somethin else for me, please" but instead wait for the food to be wasted; friends who refuse to let you know that you're in the wrong side of the road; loved ones who never felt a single thing when they saw you cry so you end up distracted about what they could be thinking about you; a man who’s too ashamed to tell the world that his sister is mentally disabled; people who thinks you're happy because you smile and you laugh and you type in ":D" or "lol"; cowards who cannot admit the truth because they’re too damn scared of the consequences. So it’s easier to be insensitive.

I think that’s bullshit. I’m not saying it never happened to me though. You know when you walk that road and you come across someone you don’t wanna be talking with, so you pretend not to see the person, do stuff like check on your cell phone or look away. I’ve been in that sitch. When you say you ain’t jealous but your heart is opposing, so then you tell yourself to believe you’re not so you can avoid arguments; I’ve been there. Now, some of you, readers, who’d say these has never happened to you.. I know it has.. Even in the smallest, little, unnoticeable way, it has. Why is it so easy to be insensitive? Some are even born naturally insensitive! Wow. I mean I can be like that intentionally; for me, I’m not a mind reader but I’m reading the signs. I guess some people are just plain naïve. They won’t see it unless you present it to them with a dialogue; they won’t see its worth unless you started demanding; they won’t eat it unless you spoon feed them; I guess that’s the irony of insensitivity.. they won’t see you until you finally left.